It’s amazing, the lies you can tell yourself. Even more amazing, the lies you can believe when you’re desperate enough.
I am still my teenage self. If you think that we all step through a door marked Adult, or that we sign a Grown-Up Document, you’re quite wrong. We remain as we always were, and that, alas, is one of life’s many nasty tricks.
Sometimes you need to remind yourself that you were the one who carried you through the heartache. You are the one who sits with the cold body on the shower floor, and picks it up. You are the one who feeds it, who clothes it, who tucks it into bed, and you should be proud of that. Having the strength to take care of yourself when everyone around you is trying to bleed you dry, that is the strongest thing in the universe.
Be with someone who you don’t have to hide from, in any way. Whether it’s your morning face before you’ve put your make up on, an embarrassing story to tell about something that happened on your way home, or an ambition you’ve had since you were six… make sure you end up with someone who knows all of it and still loves you. A person you can tell your whole life to is a person worth spending a life with.
The way you glance at me when you think I might be looking your way is one of my favorite things in the world.
These are the days that must happen to you.
1. Always take pictures of the sky when it’s pretty, it probably won’t ever look like that again.
2. Wear that skirt you like, even if your mom says it’s too short.
3. Take off the dark eyeliner and nail polish once in a while, you’ll feel lighter.
4. Chop off your hair if you want, it will grow back eventually.
5. Count the freckles on your arms and draw lines between them, your skin is like the night sky.
6. Sleep under six blankets with the fan on high in the middle of the winter, the sound is soothing.
7. Tell that boy to stop touching your thigh, even if it is flattering.
8. Say thank you and flash a smile when your sister says that your outfit is ugly.
9. Raise your hand when you know the answer, even if the class is all upperclassmen.
10. Read that book again, you’ll notice something you didn’t the first time.
11. Don’t drink too much caffeine, you’ll get the jitters and bomb your math test.
12. Wear pencils behind your ears, it’s convenient.
13. Try to talk to people, it won’t kill you.
14. When a cute boy tries to cheat off your test, write the wrong answers and change them later.
15. It’s ok to feel happy, don’t let other peoples sadness make you feel bad.